you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
all he gave me for my birthday was sperm
at least its a homemade gift
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
Remind me never to smoke before babysitting again. Ate an entire bottle of children's gummy vitamins.... not an easy thing to explain to parents.
Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
Shout out to my liver for being the true MVP. It easily put in more work than LeBron or Curry this week.
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
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