is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
Randomize
