She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
As I type I'm climbing my cousins swingset so I can take a nap inside the slide. Fuck this hangover. I always win.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
He said "I can't wait for you to feel me inside of you so I can tell you gently that you're mine" and left me a 4 minute voice mail of him crying after I told him I didn't want to be with him. 30 year olds are off limits.
My friend wants your phone number so you can teach her how to take a beer bong. She saw you doing them last night and got jealous.
Just tell her to open her throat. I don't want to talk to anyone who is jealous of someone who woke up this morning with a cat in their shirt as a result of that glorious beer bonging skill.
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
Randomize