your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
Telling her that my penis is called megatron was not a good idea for a first date.
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you tried to tell me that ice cream had no calories because they were "frozen"
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
Sorry, i'm on a strict diet of vodka and regret
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
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