oh vodka. i could write you a sonnet.
Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
im using old socks as coasters. im going to make a great housewife.
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
It's the never-ending clusterfuck that is my love life
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
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