My hair reeks of homosexuality.
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's only 4 pm and I'm already way past my preferred quota of "could have died" moments
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
btw telling the cab driver, that took you to your booty call that is now returning your wallet that you left in his cab, that you want to hug him is awkward
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
Apparently the cops had to handcuff me in order to get me to come with to the hospital with them. They asked me if I had had any experience with handcuffs before and I replied, "Only in bed." What a life
Please stop calling me a pterodactyl during sex. It only happens when you're drunk, but still.
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
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