In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
Nothing commands respect in a meeting like Jack Daniels on the breath. You're fine.
He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
Hung over and there is no way in the world I can make this mess look good today. Only solution is to stay drunk.
I also need to get my life together but instead I just eat spoonfuls of Nutella. We can't win 'em all
Randomize
