i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
nobody understands how my tooth became embedded in the ceiling last night.
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
I've been on this train for an hour and this women has been on the phone and all she's said is "guuurrrrrlllll, gurl, gurl." I may commit suicide.
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
The guy who was interviewing me asked if I had coke on my pants. You win this time Las Vegas
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
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