Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
my vag is so smooth its legendary
shit is crazy. i just keep thinking that this kid growing inside Emily used to live in my balls.
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
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