The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
Who pooed in my magic bullet?
Sorry the bathroom was being used.
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
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