My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
I just called my cat a slut and she responded. Proudest moment ever.
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
Stop chatting and get in the fucking car. I didn't get my asexual ass out of bed just to watch you flirt and fail with someone you're never going to see again.
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
Randomize
