That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
Picking up third year law school girls is like MILF hunting for beginners
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
So, I'm stoned at his house petting the neighbors cat I made him steal.
You're a fucking train wreck.
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
I was too hungover to read the menu. I literally pointed at a picture of an advertisement and handed the cashier my card
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
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