Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
You know it's an interesting night when you drunkenly scream at your boss, "You'd make a HORRIBLE OBGYN!! You're hands are ENORMOUS!"
She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
A monkey stole my iPod. This was not in the fucking study abroad brochure
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
It's going to be weird as hell when you have kids. I'll meet them and think "Hi, Did you know that I was almost your dad?"
Who gets call-your-ex-from-4-years-ago drunk on a Thursday??
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
The assignment was about the Industrial Revolution so I just screamed at them in a British accent all day. No, they didn't know I was hungover.
Thanks for going with me today. It’s been a long time since I bought bra and panties because of a guy
It’s called “shopping for lingerie” and it’s one of the many exciting and sexy things that follow a divorce, along with sexting, sleepovers, and orgasms
But, our next lesson is picking up a younger guys at the bar!
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