check it out our google latitudes are spooning
Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
I'm hiding out in the living room until he falls back asleep. If he catches a whiff of my tits, it's all over. I just need to play it cool. Babies can smell fear
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
Laziness has hit a new level. I'm out of clean sexy underwear and meeting a boy tonight so I'm having a thong delivered via post mates.
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
"Here let me wipe my uterus off your dick" was probably the most unsexy thing said after period sex. I should get an award
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