I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
Thanks for making me watch you dance provacatively by yourself in the bathroom so you could see if you looked fat.
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
Alright, my brain isn't sure how to properly function on a Wednesday with no hangover and more than 3 hours of sleep.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
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