dude you just took shreks wife home. what the fuck is wrong with you
when a bears hungry he eats besides shes got her nipples pierced
i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... π―πππ
Do I even want to know?
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
Real life skills section of my resume: blow jobs, food knowledge trivia, sarcasm, mascaera application, sexting, tolerance of rail liquors
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