Pants 0. Shit 1.
shit pants at work. discarded underwear.
just showed this text to the guy at west elm. luckily we did not stool ourselves in the midst of the ensuing hilarity. so you're commando now?
yep! most awkward part is that i was a few feet away from a client, talking and looking him in the eye. i've never stooled while looking someone directly in the eye.
I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
this just has baby written all over it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
Yes, you did come over last night. You also tried to give my dog a blowjob. You got rejected.
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
Randomize