I heard we made out
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
Mom and I shoplifted today. Her idea.
Retirement sounds fun.
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
LOL he's a hopeless romantic now? 🤔 I'd say giving him a bj in a freakin softball dugout isn't the most romantic thing but it still happened
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
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