My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
I only gave you my number because I thought fat people were jolly
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
Single lady's Saturday night: eat doritos, masturbate, eat more doritos. Do shot of Jager. Repeat until desired result is achieved.
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
Fun fact: You might be drunk if your vision is so blurry that you almost ask "do you know where my glasses are?" while you're wearing them.
My dad told me that my grandparents are giving me $20,000 and my actual response was "do you know how many kittens I could buy with that?!?"
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
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