Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
dude my little brother busts into my room last night and yells did you know that grandma is hiding scrambled eggs between her legs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
Only you would have to block the fucking governor of Tennessee from reading your tweets
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
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