But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
noo you weren't that drunk. you just knocked the grill over and couldn't get the key in the door, so you climbed through the window. success.
I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?
But on the up side she uprooted a whole peony plant from the hotel downtown and said, "I brought you flowers"
i just remembered that i did the "single ladies" dance ON THE BAR...fuck you slippery nipples i curse the day i discovered you
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
Randomize
