The vibrating part of my dildo broke, now I have to rely on gyration.
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
Thanks for making me watch you dance provacatively by yourself in the bathroom so you could see if you looked fat.
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
im eating kix cereal and taking shots by myself. please come hang out with me. im desperate
I had a dream about a turtle sitting on top of a horse skull. I'm certain its a symbol for my dead sex life. Trust me.
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
we went to go have morning sex and I said “I was gonna put my mouth on it but you need to shower”#ruinedthemoment
But seriously like how many girls do you know that will do that on the first date?
One?
ONE! And it was was glorious!
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