We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
He stopped in the middle of having sex to ask me what shampoo I use. Apparently my hair smelled good
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
if you didn't cry because you couldn't find me and then pee your bed, your wingman status would totally be revoked for leaving me at that party.
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
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