How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
You were so drunk you decided to go out of the car window instead of using the door, once you realized what you had just done you said fuck it and went back in through the window
I just crashed on my couch and have no intention of ever getting up again
I will be over with a bedpan and beer
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
I'm thankful I didn't get drunk and shit my pants this year. 🦃
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
