is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
Have you finally orgasmed yet?
After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
I made her dinner: Beefaroni with grated parmesan cheese on top. Luckily she showed up drunk and gave me head, "For spending so much time preparing."
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
I got blood in my smoothie but it still tastes ok. Fuck glenfiddich.
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
My liver has officially said "fuck this shit" and escaped from my body.
Randomize
