I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
In other news there is a guy at my office who I'm pretty sure will be wearing someone's skin as a coat one day.
I don't want to flatter myself but after the way he was looking at me today I think it might be me.
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
I’m lazy so obviously looking like a rotisserie chicken is my favourite position
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
Randomize
