I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
Oh my god, I totally forgot we call your penis "Godzilla's Tail".
Why is there a cash register on top of my car?
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
Jarrod's passed out on the chair with a cup of milk and I've been staring him down in an attempt to use telepathy to make him spill it. Attempts unsuccessful.
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
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