First thing she said after sex was.. are you baptised by chance?
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
Noted. Next time you want to get fried chicken and cocaine.
Ok. That just sounds baller.
You texted him 17 times. Asking for him back and sending random pictures of Jimmy Buffett. He didn't answer.
I've broken 3 vibrators in the past month because I apparently am "too rough" with them. Is that even possible?!
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
Randomize
