i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
I stole all of the toasting champagne and did an interpretive dance to "wind beneath my wings". I am literally everything you're not supposed to do at weddings.
But your showmanship is impeccable.
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
Just because I'm sleeping with him doesn't mean I'm in love with him, it means that I want to have sex with someone who isn't a serial killer.
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Randomize
