Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
hey is it cool if i invite some fat girls to the party so i can be the skinny one?
yeah okay. but if i take one home with me you have to come over in the morning and tell her to get her shit and go.
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
strike, motherfucker.
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
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