I drank it, and now my boss keeps hitting me in the face with beams of light.
Tripping at your desk probably isn't the best plan you've had.
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
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