The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
You kept telling the cops that our ice luge was practice for the next winter olympics
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
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