i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
Turns out I'm like the Wayne Gretzky of hiding cum. Who knew?
Thanks for making me watch you dance provacatively by yourself in the bathroom so you could see if you looked fat.
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
dude she got out of bed and definitely took a shit then checked her stomach out in the mirror and whispered "well that probably took off five pounds"
I'm not trying to be dramatic but if someone makes you choose between getting a Brazilian or dying. For the sake of your sanity just fucking die
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
When you're looking for your panties tomorrow, you traded them for a blunt on the train.
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
I need a hoe opinion
go on
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
Randomize
