sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
#1- I went to button my shirt only to find they were all mising. #2- I'm so fu@king sore I feel like I was sweating to the oldies all night. #3- this pounding headache I have, I blame solely on Jennifer. Everyone sounds like Billy Mays when they talk. I remember nothing from last night, I'm concerned.
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
While we were driving she just screams from the backseat: MUMFORD AND SONS DROP THE BANJO and made what were meant to be banjo sound effects
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
Well I just put wine in my tea
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
Randomize