i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
be a good friend and just tell me i'm not pregnant
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
He made a toga out of my hot pink bed sheets and cracked an egg on his head. Then he proceeded to alphabetize our DVD collection, which was impressive because I'm 99% sure he couldn't have done that sober.
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
I JUST SENT A TOILET SELFIE TO THE WRONG PERSON.
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
Randomize
