He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
He about cried when I ordered pizza online. He said it was a miracle.
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
You've ruined blow jobs for me. You were the motzart of sucking dick, where every other girl is like awkward elevator music
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
When I woke up next to him on the living room floor, my glasses were broken and it felt like someone rubbed a cactus all over my vag
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
You added his wife on Facebook?! You're horrible at this mistress thing
If I ever drink whiskey again make sure I don't eat the plastic cups that I'm drinking them from.
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
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