So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
I love how our sober spotter means you only have to stay sober enough to type your pin in an ATM
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
Randomize
