even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
Its about making memories worth repressing
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
He scratched off my spray tan. Literal nail marks down my back. Can't imagine what's underneath his fingernails.
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
you just missed a great speech in which i almost coined the term "ass-ian" as in "my vaginal and ass-ian regions are no longer safe"
God please dont post that to facebook.
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
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