So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
i awoke yet another morning with penis breath. ive been so generous santa has to bring me a shit ton of presents
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
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