I wannas sexs uuuuu
I had a dream last night that I had to pretend I liked Dave Matthews Band to impress this girl I was talking to.
I guess it was more of a nightmare.
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
So, remember how that one doctor said it was 1 in a million that I'd get pregnant...
Yeeah thank god
Well..welcome to parenting Mr. one in a million.
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
If you ever get divorced...would you call me??
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
Randomize
