in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
i'm getting the "you hooked up with my friends" speech from him. i'm returning with the "gotta keep my quota up" speech
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
When I wake up, please remind me why my shoe is in the toilet, my shower is filled with jello, and there is a naked girl sleeping on my coffee table holding a bag of Cheetos. that is all.
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
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