Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
you kept yelling something about watching the muppets chirstmas carol and trying to turn the t.v. on with your car keys
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
Dude you have to stop using "I eat good pussy" as a pick up line
I'm surrounded by 3 year olds in tutus. They are far too innocent to be within at least 500 ft of me.
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
How was that my fault?! I made you breakfast and gave you cake, as you asked. Then, you initiated sexual activity.
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
Randomize
