the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
My mom is selling her car. I'm secretly relieved I won't ever have to tell her about that time you puked in it
She shows up drunk at 3am for sex and then punches me straight in the eye in the middle of it because "you're too nice."
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
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