ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
Just realized I'm going to have to make you sign a non-disclosure agreement before my wedding.
He told me he was married and then fingered me on the kitchen counter. It was awkward to explaining the broken toaster to my roommates this morning...
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
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