There's a man in a pair of gray footie pajamas and a paper crown watching the kids at the playground. It was easier to tell who was a pedophile before Where the Wild Things Are came out.
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
the bouncer made me realize that puking in line does not get you in any faster
Just want you to know I am def drunk enough to burn down your house. Don't worry I checked the stove like 6 times. I love grilled cheese
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My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
Apparently he proposed after he saw me chug vodka out of a traffic cone.
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
Bruh why you gotta judge
You're awake at 3:30 in the morning RSVPing to a musical, I'm well within my means
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
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