what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
cell reception changed and I can no longer text you from the toilet... that means I'll be texting you less often, just fyi
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
If we had kids we couldn't come home, get high and watch porn together. And that's like the only reason I get up in the morning
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
Good news, my sex bruises are fading. Bad news, my boobs look like I have a skin disease because of it.
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
Of course, you have to give the courtesy text like last night when I told you my dick was gonna smell like peppermint
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
Randomize
