if i die, you can have my worn out liver and american apparel deep v's.sell the liver to a chinese restaurant
Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
Just got a 200 dollar safe, two jars, and a 500 pack of rubber bands.. This doesn't SCREAM drug dealer does it?
...you should fill the cart some more
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
Panties = found
I refuse to take any type of advice let alone love advice from a motherfucker who is missing 3 fingers from a Fucked up masturbating accident.
Randomize
