I saw his package. It spoke to me.
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
I'm playing wingman, but I want to pull a Goose and die.
Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
I woke up today in my boxers hugging a log and realized that I think I've gotten close enough to nature. I really need to stop doing shrooms with you
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
Randomize