sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
I said ACK before Andy Samberg made it even remotely funny. That tool is stealing all my lines.
Yeah, you've definitely been jizzing in your pants years before he made it socially acceptable
i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
I sign my lease Thursday, I'm about to be released back into the wild.
I'll make missing person signs.
You're a good friend.
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
Randomize
