covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
Tomorrow after you go to the library to look up gay porn, I'm going to come to your apartment to paint a nude portrait of you. Get pumped, plopernickle.
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
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