i just heard the ice cream truck outside while mid-masturbation. i stopped and considered running outside to buy one.
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
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i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
Find me a date. With a beard. I want him to rub his beard on my tits. I'm not even into that stuff but I think it'd be so warm.
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
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I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
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