just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
Left and drinking by a bar by myself. Everyone is in pajamas. I'm in a tuxedo. This is my life.
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I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
I had sex for the second time today and ate an entire bag of alligator jerky on the way home. These truly are the golden years.
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
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So the pizza place just called me after an hour saying they don't have dough
It's not safe here. I had urgent and violent diarrhea last night, and I got blackout drunk. Please don't come over.
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
We need to borrow someone's dog. Just so we can non-creepily go to PetSmart and watch all the other dogs take photos with Santa
I look excited, but its just a facade.
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
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